Friday, August 15, 2008

Let Me Tell You About My Grandchildren, My Skin Disease, And My Neighbor's Cousin Who Knows Somebody Who Got Pregnant With A Turkey Baister

Ok. I'm talking about it.

I've got poison ivy.

And it itches. For 3 weeks it itches.

I obtained a steroid off the black market- but it was only a 3 day supply. So, for three days I stopped itching- but grew facial hair, bulked up, and picked fights with random strangers.

She said: "What you looking at?"
Random stranger said: "Uh, I was just looking at the price tag on the loaf of bread."
She said: "Good, let's keep it that way."

Now I'm still itching, steroid is gone, I have no friends left, and I can't find my tweezers.

What would you do?



6 comments:

Keetha Broyles said...

I'd march myself right down to the ER today and see Greggie Broyles and let him help you with that PI problem. He's GREAT, and being a fellow sufferer, he will make sure you get enough meds to end the itchy rash and dry it right up.

He works until 4 today, So don't delay!! (Do you like the rhyme? I did THAT on purpose.)

PS - - - Did you get your MGH Vigor magazine? Well - - - don't THROW IT AWAY until you read the AMAZING article about the girl whose life was saved by a now famous ER PA - - - - go on - - - go look!!!

Shannon said...

Does he like it when strangers call him Greggie?

No, I don't get Vigor. Or I would go look right now.

Keetha Broyles said...

If you live in this county - - - you get Vigor. You probably throw it away with all the OTHER junk mail. I'll find ours and blog about it - - - don't know why I haven't done that already, it's pretty cool what my little ole hubby did which made the magazine.

BTW - - - I ONLY AIM TO PLEASE - - - so I've changed your moniker in my links list - - - look again.

Shannon said...

That is so funny! Is your hubby a doctor?

Anonymous said...

So if I come out to your house and a gorilla answers the door, am I to assume that it's really you?

If you laugh, the steroids have worn out. If you snarl, I'll know that they're still pumpin'

Toevs said...

i read the vigor mag... i would go see greggie.